Conciseness Paragrapgh

1) Paste in a terribly overwritten paragraph (you could probably find one in a blog or really any poorly edited website.

2)Paste in your corrected version, or at least describe at least 3 ways you’d make the paragraph more precise.

Show examples where you have tried some of these measures:

You might chose to make some sentences have active voice. You might eliminate wordiness or long wind ups. You might make sure that items joined together in a series or with “and” or “but” are constructed in the same grammatical form (parallel). Finally, you might turn verbs that masquerade as nouns into their verb forms.