I will post my draft, and my classmates’s evaluations. Write about 250 words. Do not write over 250 words.
Summarize your peers’ evaluations of your own draft and your plans for revision—and post them in this discussion. Respond to the following prompts in summarizing your peers’ evaluations of your Problem Flyer draft. 1. What areas of your draft are strongest? According to your peers (not you), what are the strengths of your draft? Offer specific details. 2. What needs to be improved? According to your peers (not you), how do you need to improve your draft before submitting the final version? 3. Briefly describe your plans for revising and improving your draft according to your peers’ assessments and recommendations. How will you revise your draft to meet your peers’ expectations, the assignment’s requirements, and professional standards?
Your English and grammar looks pretty good! Job well done. However you do have a lot of writing and it can be a bit overwhelming. My suggestion would be to add bullet points and increase font size while eliminating some explanation.
For example, under “What will happen if we don’t fix this problem?” you could bullet point “Malnutrition and Health” and “Education & Homelessness”. You could even divide Education and Homelessness and have three bullet points. You can still leave some more detailed underneath, I’d just suggest contrasting the two fonts by size.
I’d also suggest this same technique for your solution suggestions. So you could bullet point Job Creation, Raising Minimum wage, Quality Education and Health, etc. I’d also suggest focusing in on only one or two solutions. Of course all of your solutions have some sort of effect on poverty, but I’d try to focus on an idea that you can attempt to tackle on a smaller scale.
I think overall the information that you have for your flyer is good, I like the idea of the picture that you have in the background of your flyer and I chose to do the same thing with mine as well. What I do suggest though is maybe chose a lighter picture to put on the flyer because the darkness blends with the dark lettering, meaning that it is not as easy on the eyes to read.